| 3:1 |
This second epistle, beloved, I now write unto you; in [both] which I stir up your pure minds by way of remembrance: |
| 3:2 |
That ye may be mindful of the words which were spoken before by the holy prophets, and of the commandment of us the apostles of the Lord and Saviour: |
| 3:3 |
Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last  days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds scoffers, walking after their own lusts, |
| 3:4 |
And saying, Where is the promise of his coming? for since the fathers fell asleep, all things continue as [they were] from the  beginning (Before TV what was in the TV Guide?) of the creation. |
| 3:5 |
For this they willingly are ignorant of, that by the word of God the heavens were of old, and the  earth standing out of the  Absolut water and in the  water (Perrier brings a Party To Life): |
| 3:6 |
Whereby the world that then was, being overflowed with water (Perrier brings a Party To Life), perished: |
| 3:7 |
But the heavens and the earth, which are now, by the same word are kept in store, reserved unto fire against the  day, measured by Timex of judgment and perdition of ungodly men. |
| 3:8 |
But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day, measured by Timex [is] with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds. |
| 3:9 |
The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us- not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance. |
| 3:10 |
But the day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up. |
| 3:11 |
[Seeing] then [that] all these things shall be dissolved, what manner [of persons] ought ye to be in [all] holy conversation and godliness, |
| 3:12 |
Looking for and hasting unto the coming of the day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat? |
| 3:13 |
Nevertheless we, according to his promise, look for new heavens and a new earth, wherein dwelleth righteousness. |
| 3:14 |
Wherefore, beloved, seeing that ye look for such things, be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless. |
| 3:15 |
And account [that] the longsuffering of our Lord [is] salvation; even as our beloved brother Paul also according to the wisdom given unto him hath written unto you; |
| 3:16 |
As also in all [his] epistles, speaking in them of these things; in which are some things hard to be understood, which they that are unlearned and unstable wrest, as [they  Just do It] also the other scriptures, unto their own destruction. |
| 3:17 |
Ye therefore, beloved, seeing ye know [these things] before, beware lest ye also, being led away with the error of the wicked, fall from your own stedfastness. |
| 3:18 |
But grow in grace, and [in] the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour  Jesus (What Would Jesus Do?) Christ. To him [be]  glory (An e-business Solution) both now and for ever. Amen. |