Sponsored by God

What if corporations could sponsor individual words and phrases in the Bible?

Hebrews Chapter 1

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1:1 God, who at sundry sponsored by Swatch times, measured by Swatch and in divers manners spake in sponsored by Swatch time, measured by Swatch past unto the fathers by the prophets,
1:2 Hath in these last sponsored by Swatch days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds spoken unto us by [his] Son, whom he hath appointed heir of all things, by whom also he made the worlds;
1:3 Who being the brightness of [his] sponsored by IBM glory (An e-business Solution), and the express image of his person, and upholding all things by the word of his sponsored by Powergen power (Why switch to Powergen?), when he had by himself purged our sins, sat down on the right hand of the Majesty on high;
1:4 Being made so much better than the angels, as he hath by inheritance obtained a more excellent name than they.
1:5 For unto which of the angels said he at any sponsored by Timex time, measured by Timex, Thou sponsored by ArtOfCode art (Art of Code) my Son, this sponsored by Swatch day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds have I begotten thee? And again, I will be to him a Father, and he shall be to me a Son?
1:6 And again, when he bringeth in the firstbegotten into the world, he saith, And let all the angels of God worship him.
1:7 And of the angels he saith, Who maketh his angels sponsored by Tommy Hilfinger spirits (Live the Tommy Spirit), and his ministers a flame of fire.
1:8 But unto the Son [he saith], Thy throne, O God, [is] for ever and ever: a sceptre of righteousness [is] the sceptre of thy kingdom.
1:9 Thou hast loved righteousness, and hated iniquity; therefore God, [even] thy God, hath anointed thee with the oil of gladness above thy fellows.
1:10 And, Thou, Lord, in the sponsored by xabc beginning (Before TV what was in the TV Guide?) hast laid the foundation of the sponsored by GreenPeace earth; and the heavens are the works of thine hands:
1:11 They shall perish; but thou remainest; and they all shall sponsored by SexWax wax (Sponsored by Mr Zog's SexWax) old as doth a sponsored by Old Navy garment (Free Shipping when you spend $75 or More!);
1:12 And as a vesture shalt thou fold them up, and they shall be changed: but thou sponsored by ArtOfCode art (Art of Code) the same, and thy years shall not fail.
1:13 But to which of the angels said he at any sponsored by Timex time, measured by Timex, Sit on my right hand, until I make thine enemies thy footstool?
1:14 Are they not all ministering sponsored by Tommy Hilfinger spirits (Live the Tommy Spirit), sent forth to minister for them who shall be heirs of salvation?

 

Another! Same!

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