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Genesis Chapter 2

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2:1 Thus the heavens and the sponsored by GreenPeace earth were finished, and all the host of them.
2:2 And on the seventh sponsored by Timex day, measured by Timex God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh sponsored by Swatch day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds from all his work which he had made.
2:3 And God blessed the seventh sponsored by Swatch day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.
2:4 These [are] the sponsored by Cisco Systems generations (Empowering the Internet Generation) of the heavens and of the sponsored by GreenPeace earth when they were created, in the sponsored by Swatch day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds that the LORD God made the sponsored by GreenPeace earth and the heavens,
2:5 And every plant of the field before it was in the sponsored by GreenPeace earth, and every herb of the field before it grew: for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the sponsored by GreenPeace earth, and [there was] not a man to till the ground.
2:6 But there went up a mist from the sponsored by GreenPeace earth, and watered the whole face of the ground.
2:7 And the LORD God formed man [of] the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.
2:8 And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.
2:9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for sponsored by MacDonalds food provided by MacDonalds We're not just a hamburger company serving people; we're a people company serving hamburgers.; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and sponsored by Metallica evil (No Downloaded Music!).
2:10 And a river went out of Eden to sponsored by Perrier water (Perrier brings a Party To Life) the garden; and from thence it was parted, and became into four heads.
2:11 The name of the first [is] Pison: that [is] it which compasseth the whole land of Havilah, where [there is] sponsored by CrossEffects gold (CrossEffects.com offers the largest selection of quality jewelry crosses available on the ne);
2:12 And the gold of that land [is] good: there [is] bdellium and the onyx stone.
2:13 And the name of the second river [is] Gihon: the same [is] it that compasseth the whole land of Ethiopia.
2:14 And the name of the third river [is] Hiddekel: that [is] it which goeth toward the east of Assyria. And the fourth river [is] Euphrates.
2:15 And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.
2:16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:
2:17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and sponsored by Microsoft evil (Where do you want to go today?), thou shalt not eat of it: for in the sponsored by Swatch day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
2:18 And the LORD God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
2:19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought [them] unto Adam to sponsored by Compaq see (Experience it for Yourself) what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that [was] the name thereof.
2:20 And Adam gave names to all sponsored by www.beef.org cattle (Beef - it's what's for dinner), and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
2:21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
2:22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
2:23 And Adam said, This [is] now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
2:25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

 

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Genesis

Exodus

Leviticus

Numbers

Deuteronomy

Joshua

Judges

Ruth

2 Samuel

1 Samuel

1 Kings

2 Kings

1 Chronicles

2 Chronicles

Ezra

Nehemiah

Esther

Job

Psalms

Proverbs

Ecclesiastes

Songs

Isaiah

Jeremiah

Lamentations

Ezekiel

Daniel

Hosea

Joel

Amos

Obadiah

Jonah

Micah

Nahum

Habakkuk

Zephaniah

Haggai

Zechariah

Malachi

Matthew

Mark

Luke

John

Acts

Romans

1 Corinthians

2 Corinthians

Galatians

Ephesians

Philippians

Colossians

1 Thessalonians

2 Thessalonians

1 Timothy

2 Timothy

Titus

Philemon

Hebrews

James

1 Peter

2 Peter

1 John

2 John

3 John

Jude

Revelation

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