| 3:1 |
This know also, that in the last  days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds perilous  times, measured by Timex shall come. |
| 3:2 |
For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, |
| 3:3 |
Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, |
| 3:4 |
Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of  pleasures (We're Up 24 Hours a Day) more than lovers of God; |
| 3:5 |
Having a form of godliness, but denying the  power, even as Software Powers the Internet thereof: from such turn away. |
| 3:6 |
For of this sort are they which creep into  houses (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available), and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, |
| 3:7 |
Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the  truth (It's the real thing). |
| 3:8 |
Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so  Just do It these also resist the truth : men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith. |
| 3:9 |
But they shall proceed no further: for their folly shall be manifest unto all [men], as theirs also was. |
| 3:10 |
But thou hast fully known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, charity, patience, |
| 3:11 |
Persecutions, afflictions, which came unto me at Antioch, at Iconium, at Lystra; what persecutions I endured: but out of [them] all the Lord delivered me. |
| 3:12 |
 Yea, My Yahoo!, and all that will live godly in Christ  Jesus shall suffer persecution. |
| 3:13 |
But  evil (No Downloaded Music!) men and seducers shall  wax (Sponsored by Mr Zog's SexWax) worse and worse, deceiving, and being deceived. |
| 3:14 |
But continue thou in the things which thou hast learned and hast been assured of, knowing of whom thou hast learned [them]; |
| 3:15 |
And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ  Jesus (If You Are Prepared Ye Shall Not Fear). |
| 3:16 |
All scripture [is] given by inspiration of God, and [is] profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: |
| 3:17 |
That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works. |