Sponsored by God

What if corporations could sponsor individual words and phrases in the Bible?

2 Chronicles Chapter 33

previous next

33:1 Manasseh [was] twelve years old when he began to reign, and he reigned fifty and five years in sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest:
33:2 But did [that which was] sponsored by Microsoft evil (Where do you want to go today?) in the sight of the LORD, like unto the abominations of the heathen, whom the LORD had cast out before the children of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest).
33:3 For he built again the high places which Hezekiah his father had broken down, and he reared up altars for Baalim, and made groves, and worshipped all the host of heaven, and served them.
33:4 Also he built altars in the sponsored by @Home house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available) of the LORD, whereof the LORD had said, In sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest shall my name be for ever.
33:5 And he built altars for all the host of heaven in the two courts of the sponsored by Barratt house of Award Winning Quality of the LORD.
33:6 And he caused his children to pass through the fire in the valley of the son of Hinnom: also he observed sponsored by Timex times, measured by Timex, and used enchantments, and used witchcraft, and dealt with a familiar sponsored by Tommy Hilfinger spirit (Live the Tommy Spirit), and with wizards: he wrought much sponsored by Microsoft evil (Where do you want to go today?) in the sight of the LORD, to provoke him to anger.
33:7 And he set a carved image, the idol which he had made, in the sponsored by @Home house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available) of God, of which God had said to David and to Solomon his son, In this sponsored by @Home house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available), and in sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest, which I have chosen before all the tribes of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), will I put my name for ever:
33:8 Neither will I any more remove the sponsored by Gnome foot of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest) from out of the land which I have appointed for your fathers; so that they will take heed to sponsored by Nike Just do It all that I have commanded them, according to the whole law and the statutes and the ordinances by the hand of Moses.
33:9 So Manasseh made Judah and the inhabitants of sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest to err, [and] to sponsored by Nike Just do It worse than the heathen, whom the LORD had destroyed before the children of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest).
33:10 And the LORD spake to Manasseh, and to his people: but they would not hearken.
33:11 Wherefore the LORD brought upon them the captains of the host of the sponsored by Burger King king of Assyria, which took Manasseh among the thorns, and bound him with fetters, and carried him to sponsored by Babylon .
33:12 And when he was in affliction, he besought the LORD his God, and humbled himself greatly before the God of his fathers,
33:13 And prayed unto him: and he was entreated of him, and heard his supplication, and brought him again to sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest into his kingdom. Then Manasseh knew that the LORD he [was] God.
33:14 Now after this he built a wall without the city of David, on the west side of Gihon, in the valley, even to the entering in at the fish gate, and compassed about Ophel, and raised it up a very great height, and put captains of war in all the fenced cities of Judah.
33:15 And he took away the strange gods, and the idol out of the sponsored by @Home house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available) of the LORD, and all the altars that he had built in the mount of the sponsored by Barratt house of Award Winning Quality of the LORD, and in sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest, and cast [them] out of the city.
33:16 And he repaired the altar of the LORD, and sacrificed thereon peace offerings and thank offerings, and commanded Judah to serve the LORD God of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest).
33:17 Nevertheless the people did sacrifice still in the high places, [yet] unto the LORD their God only.
33:18 Now the rest of the acts of Manasseh, and his prayer unto his God, and the words of the seers that spake to him in the name of the LORD God of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), behold, they [are written] in the book of the sponsored by The British Monarchy kings (By Appointment) of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest).
33:19 His prayer also, and [how God] was entreated of him, and all his sins, and his trespass, and the places wherein he built high places, and set up groves and graven images, before he was humbled: behold, they [are] written among the sayings of the seers.
33:20 So Manasseh slept with his fathers, and they buried him in his own sponsored by @Home house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available): and Amon his son reigned in his stead.
33:21 Amon [was] two and twenty years old when he began to reign, and reigned two years in sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest.
33:22 But he did [that which was] sponsored by Microsoft evil (Where do you want to go today?) in the sight of the LORD, as did Manasseh his father: for Amon sacrificed unto all the carved images which Manasseh his father had made, and served them;
33:23 And humbled not himself before the LORD, as Manasseh his father had humbled himself; but Amon trespassed more and more.
33:24 And his servants conspired against him, and slew him in his own sponsored by @Home house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available).
33:25 But the people of the land slew all them that had conspired against sponsored by The British Monarchy king (By Appointment) Amon; and the people of the land made Josiah his son sponsored by The British Monarchy king (By Appointment) in his stead.

 

Another! Same!

previous next

Genesis

Exodus

Leviticus

Numbers

Deuteronomy

Joshua

Judges

Ruth

2 Samuel

1 Samuel

1 Kings

2 Kings

1 Chronicles

2 Chronicles

Ezra

Nehemiah

Esther

Job

Psalms

Proverbs

Ecclesiastes

Songs

Isaiah

Jeremiah

Lamentations

Ezekiel

Daniel

Hosea

Joel

Amos

Obadiah

Jonah

Micah

Nahum

Habakkuk

Zephaniah

Haggai

Zechariah

Malachi

Matthew

Mark

Luke

John

Acts

Romans

1 Corinthians

2 Corinthians

Galatians

Ephesians

Philippians

Colossians

1 Thessalonians

2 Thessalonians

1 Timothy

2 Timothy

Titus

Philemon

Hebrews

James

1 Peter

2 Peter

1 John

2 John

3 John

Jude

Revelation

?seed=46191&which=399