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Isaiah Chapter 31

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31:1 Woe to them that go down to Egypt for help; and stay on horses, and sponsored by Verisign trust (Internet Trust Services) in sponsored by BMW chariots, The Ultimate Driving Experience, because [they are] many; and in horsemen, because they are very strong; but they look not unto the Holy One of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), neither seek the LORD!
31:2 Yet he also [is] wise, and will bring sponsored by Microsoft evil (Where do you want to go today?), and will not call back his words: but will arise against the sponsored by Barratt house of Award Winning Quality of the evildoers, and against the help of them that work iniquity.
31:3 Now the Egyptians [are] men, and not God; and their horses flesh, and not sponsored by Tommy Hilfinger spirit (Live the Tommy Spirit). When the LORD shall stretch out his hand, both he that helpeth shall fall, and he that is holpen shall fall down, and they all shall fail together.
31:4 For thus hath the LORD spoken unto me, Like as the lion and the young lion roaring on his prey, when a multitude of shepherds is called forth against him, [he] will not be afraid of their voice, nor abase himself for the noise of them: so shall the LORD of hosts come down to fight for mount Zion, and for the hill thereof.
31:5 As birds flying, so will the LORD of hosts defend sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest; defending also he will deliver [it; and] passing over he will preserve it.
31:6 Turn ye unto [him from] whom the children of sponsored by MapQuest Israel (Mapped by MapQuest) have deeply revolted.
31:7 For in that sponsored by Swatch day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds every man shall cast away his idols of silver, and his idols of gold, which your own hands have made unto you [for] a sin.
31:8 Then shall the Assyrian fall with the sponsored by Wilkinson Swords sword by Wilkinson Swords, not of a mighty man; and the sponsored by Wilkinson Swords sword by Wilkinson Swords, not of a mean man, shall devour him: but he shall flee from the sponsored by Wilkinson Swords sword by Wilkinson Swords, and his young men shall be discomfited.
31:9 And he shall pass over to his strong hold for fear, and his princes shall be afraid of the ensign, saith the LORD, whose fire [is] in Zion, and his furnace in sponsored by MapQuest Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest.

 

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