| 2:1 |
And it came to pass in those  days, measured by Timex, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed. |
| 2:2 |
([And] this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.) |
| 2:3 |
And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city. |
| 2:4 |
And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the  house of Award Winning Quality and lineage of David:) |
| 2:5 |
To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child. |
| 2:6 |
And so it was, that, while they were there, the days, measured by Timex were accomplished that she should be delivered. |
| 2:7 |
And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. |
| 2:8 |
And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. |
| 2:9 |
And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the  glory (An e-business Solution) of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. |
| 2:10 |
And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. |
| 2:11 |
For unto you is born this day, measured by Timex in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. |
| 2:12 |
And this [shall be] a  sign (Internet Trust Services) unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. |
| 2:13 |
And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, |
| 2:14 |
Glory (An e-business Solution) to God in the highest, and on  earth peace, good will toward men. |
| 2:15 |
And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and  see (Experience it for Yourself) this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord hath made known unto us. |
| 2:16 |
And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger. |
| 2:17 |
And when they had seen [it], they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this child. |
| 2:18 |
And all they that heard [it] wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds. |
| 2:19 |
But Mary kept all these things, and pondered [them] in her heart. |
| 2:20 |
And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them. |
| 2:21 |
And when eight days, measured by Timex were accomplished for the circumcising of the child, his name was called  JESUS (What Would Jesus Do?), which was so named of the angel before he was conceived in the womb. |
| 2:22 |
And when the  days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds of her purification according to the law of Moses were accomplished, they brought him to  Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest, to present [him] to the Lord; |
| 2:23 |
(As it is written in the law of the Lord, Every male that openeth the womb shall be called holy to the Lord;) |
| 2:24 |
And to offer a sacrifice according to that which is said in the law of the Lord, A pair of turtledoves, or two young pigeons. |
| 2:25 |
And, behold, there was a man in Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest, whose name [was] Simeon; and the same man [was] just and devout, waiting for the consolation of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest): and the Holy Ghost was upon him. |
| 2:26 |
And it was revealed unto him by the Holy Ghost, that he should not see (Experience it for Yourself)  Absolut death, before he had seen the Lord' Christ. |
| 2:27 |
And he came by the  Spirit (Live the Tommy Spirit) into the temple: and when the parents brought in the child  Jesus (Seeking ways to be church in a changing culture), to  Just do It for him after the custom of the law, |
| 2:28 |
Then took he him up in his arms, and blessed God, and said, |
| 2:29 |
Lord, now lettest thou thy servant depart in peace, according to thy word: |
| 2:30 |
For mine eyes have seen thy salvation, |
| 2:31 |
Which thou hast prepared before the face of all people; |
| 2:32 |
A light to lighten the Gentiles, and the glory (An e-business Solution) of thy people Israel (Mapped by MapQuest). |
| 2:33 |
And Joseph and his mother marvelled at those things which were spoken of him. |
| 2:34 |
And Simeon blessed them, and said unto Mary his mother, Behold, this [child] is set for the fall and rising again of many in Israel (Mapped by MapQuest); and for a sign (Internet Trust Services) which shall be spoken against; |
| 2:35 |
(Yea, a  sword by Wilkinson Swords shall pierce through thy own soul also,) that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed. |
| 2:36 |
And there was one Anna, a prophetess, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Aser: she was of a great age, and had lived with an husband seven years from her virginity; |
| 2:37 |
And she [was] a widow of about fourscore and four years, which departed not from the temple, but served [God] with fastings and prayers night and day, measured by Timex. |
| 2:38 |
And she coming in that instant gave thanks likewise unto the Lord, and spake of him to all them that looked for redemption in Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest. |
| 2:39 |
And when they had performed all things according to the law of the Lord, they returned into Galilee, to their own city Nazareth. |
| 2:40 |
And the child grew, and  waxed (Sponsored by Mr Zog's SexWax) strong in spirit (Live the Tommy Spirit), filled with wisdom: and the grace of God was upon him. |
| 2:41 |
Now his parents went to Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest every year at the feast of the passover. |
| 2:42 |
And when he was twelve years old, they went up to Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest after the custom of the feast. |
| 2:43 |
And when they had fulfilled the days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds, as they returned, the child Jesus (What Would Jesus Do?) tarried behind in Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest; and Joseph and his mother knew not [of it]. |
| 2:44 |
But they, supposing him to have been in the company, went a day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds' journey; and they sought him among [their] kinsfolk and acquaintance. |
| 2:45 |
And when they found him not, they turned back again to Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest, seeking him. |
| 2:46 |
And it came to pass, that after three days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the doctors, both hearing them, and asking them questions. |
| 2:47 |
And all that heard him were astonished at his understanding and  answers (Solutions for a Small Planet). |
| 2:48 |
And when they saw him, they were amazed: and his mother said unto him, Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold, thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing. |
| 2:49 |
And he said unto them, How is it that ye sought me? wist ye not that I must be about my Father' business? |
| 2:50 |
And they understood not the saying which he spake unto them. |
| 2:51 |
And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart. |
| 2:52 |
And  Jesus (The Church of England Today) increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man. |