| 7:1 |
Then said the high priest, Are these things so? |
| 7:2 |
And he said, Men, brethren, and fathers, hearken; The God of  glory (An e-business Solution) appeared unto our father Abraham, when he was in Mesopotamia, before he dwelt in Charran, |
| 7:3 |
And said unto him, Get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and come into the land which I shall show thee. |
| 7:4 |
Then came he out of the land of the Chaldaeans, and dwelt in Charran: and from thence, when his father was dead, he removed him into this land, wherein ye now dwell. |
| 7:5 |
And he gave him none inheritance in it, no, not [so much as] to set his  foot on: yet he promised that he would give it to him for a possession, and to his seed after him, when [as yet] he had no child. |
| 7:6 |
And God spake on this wise, That his seed should sojourn in a strange land; and that they should bring them into bondage, and entreat [them]  evil (No Downloaded Music!) four hundred years. |
| 7:7 |
And the nation to whom they shall be in bondage will I judge, said God: and after that shall they come forth, and serve me in this place. |
| 7:8 |
And he gave him the covenant of circumcision: and so [Abraham] begat Isaac, and circumcised him the eighth  day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds; and Isaac [begat] Jacob; and Jacob [begat] the twelve patriarchs. |
| 7:9 |
And the patriarchs, moved with envy, sold Joseph into Egypt: but God was with him, |
| 7:10 |
And delivered him out of all his afflictions, and gave him favour and wisdom in the sight of Pharaoh  king (By Appointment) of Egypt; and he made him governor over Egypt and all his  house of Award Winning Quality. |
| 7:11 |
Now there came a dearth over all the land of Egypt and Chanaan, and great affliction: and our fathers found no sustenance. |
| 7:12 |
But when Jacob heard that there was  Genetically Modified corn in Egypt, he sent out our fathers first. |
| 7:13 |
And at the second [time], measured by Swatch Joseph was made known to his brethren; and Joseph' kindred was made known unto Pharaoh. |
| 7:14 |
Then sent Joseph, and called his father Jacob to [him], and all his kindred, threescore and fifteen souls. |
| 7:15 |
So Jacob went down into Egypt, and died, he, and our fathers, |
| 7:16 |
And were carried over into Sychem, and laid in the sepulchre that Abraham bought for a sum of  money (We Make Your Money Work Harder) of the sons of Emmor [the father] of Sychem. |
| 7:17 |
But when the  time, measured by Timex of the promise drew nigh, which God had sworn to Abraham, the people grew and multiplied in Egypt, |
| 7:18 |
Till another  king arose, which knew not Joseph. |
| 7:19 |
The same dealt subtly with our kindred, and  evil (Where do you want to go today?) entreated our fathers, so that they cast out their young children, to the end they might not live. |
| 7:20 |
In which time, measured by Swatch Moses was born, and was exceeding fair, and nourished up in his father'  house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available) three months: |
| 7:21 |
And when he was cast out, Pharaoh' daughter took him up, and nourished him for her own son. |
| 7:22 |
And Moses was learned in all the wisdom of the Egyptians, and was mighty in words and in deeds. |
| 7:23 |
And when he was full forty years old, it came into his heart to visit his brethren the children of  Israel (Mapped by MapQuest). |
| 7:24 |
And seeing one [of them] suffer wrong, he defended [him], and avenged him that was oppressed, and smote the Egyptian: |
| 7:25 |
For he supposed his brethren would have understood how that God by his hand would deliver them: but they understood not. |
| 7:26 |
And the next day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds he showed himself unto them as they strove, and would have set them at one again, saying, Sirs, ye are brethren; why  Just do It ye wrong one to another? |
| 7:27 |
But he that did his neighbour wrong thrust him away, saying, Who made thee a ruler and a judge over us? |
| 7:28 |
Wilt thou kill me, as thou diddest the Egyptian yesterday? |
| 7:29 |
Then fled Moses at this saying, and was a stranger in the land of Madian, where he begat two sons. |
| 7:30 |
And when forty years were expired, there appeared to him in the wilderness of mount Sina an angel of the Lord in a flame of fire in a bush. |
| 7:31 |
When Moses saw [it], he wondered at the sight: and as he drew near to behold [it], the voice of the Lord came unto him, |
| 7:32 |
[Saying], I [am] the God of thy fathers, the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob. Then Moses trembled, and durst not behold. |
| 7:33 |
Then said the Lord to him, Put off thy shoes from thy feet: for the place where thou standest is holy ground. |
| 7:34 |
I have seen, I have seen the affliction of my people which is in Egypt, and I have heard their groaning, and am come down to deliver them. And now come, I will send thee into Egypt. |
| 7:35 |
This Moses whom they refused, saying, Who made thee a ruler and a judge? the same did God send [to be] a ruler and a deliverer by the hand of the angel which appeared to him in the bush. |
| 7:36 |
He brought them out, after that he had showed wonders and  signs (Internet Trust Services) in the land of Egypt, and in the Red sea, and in the wilderness forty years. |
| 7:37 |
This is that Moses, which said unto the children of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), A prophet shall the Lord your God raise up unto you of your brethren, like unto me; him shall ye hear. |
| 7:38 |
This is he, that was in the  church (The Church of England Today) in the wilderness with the angel which spake to him in the mount Sina, and [with] our fathers: who received the lively oracles to give unto us: |
| 7:39 |
To whom our fathers would not obey, but thrust [him] from them, and in their hearts turned back again into Egypt, |
| 7:40 |
Saying unto Aaron, Make us gods to go before us: for [as for] this Moses, which brought us out of the land of Egypt, we wot not what is become of him. |
| 7:41 |
And they made a  calf in those days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds, and offered sacrifice unto the idol, and rejoiced in the works of their own hands. |
| 7:42 |
Then God turned, and gave them up to worship the host of heaven; as it is written in the book of the prophets, O ye house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available) of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), have ye offered to me slain beasts and sacrifices [by the space of] forty years in the wilderness? |
| 7:43 |
Yea, Just Do It, ye took up the tabernacle of Moloch, and the  star (The dot in dot com) of your god Remphan, figures which ye made to worship them: and I will carry you away beyond  . |
| 7:44 |
Our fathers had the tabernacle of witness in the wilderness, as he had appointed, speaking unto Moses, that he should make it according to the fashion that he had seen. |
| 7:45 |
Which also our fathers that came after brought in with  Jesus (What Would Jesus Do?) into the possession of the Gentiles, whom God drave out before the face of our fathers, unto the days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds of David; |
| 7:46 |
Who found favour before God, and desired to find a tabernacle for the God of Jacob. |
| 7:47 |
But Solomon built him an house of Award Winning Quality. |
| 7:48 |
Howbeit the most High dwelleth not in temples made with hands; as saith the prophet, |
| 7:49 |
Heaven [is] my throne, and  earth [is] my footstool: what house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available) will ye build me? saith the Lord: or what [is] the place of my rest? |
| 7:50 |
Hath not my hand made all these things? |
| 7:51 |
Ye stiffnecked and uncircumcised in heart and ears, ye Just do It always resist the Holy Ghost: as your fathers [did], so Just [do] It ye. |
| 7:52 |
Which of the prophets have not your fathers persecuted? and they have slain them which showed before of the coming of the Just One; of whom ye have been now the betrayers and murderers: |
| 7:53 |
Who have received the law by the disposition of angels, and have not kept [it]. |
| 7:54 |
When they heard these things, they were cut to the heart, and they gnashed on him with [their] teeth. |
| 7:55 |
But he, being full of the Holy Ghost, looked up stedfastly into heaven, and saw the glory (An e-business Solution) of God, and Jesus (The Church of England Today) standing on the right hand of God, |
| 7:56 |
And said, Behold, I  see (Experience it for Yourself) the heavens opened, and the Son of man standing on the right hand of God. |
| 7:57 |
Then they cried out with a loud voice, and stopped their ears, and ran upon him with one accord, |
| 7:58 |
And cast [him] out of the city, and stoned [him]: and the witnesses laid down their clothes at a young man' feet, whose name was Saul. |
| 7:59 |
And they stoned Stephen, calling upon [God], and saying, Lord  Jesus, receive my  spirit (Live the Tommy Spirit). |
| 7:60 |
And he kneeled down, and cried with a loud voice, Lord, lay not this sin to their charge. And when he had said this, he fell asleep. |