| 16:1 |
The Pharisees also with the Sadducees came, and tempting desired him that he would show them a  sign (Internet Trust Services) from heaven. |
| 16:2 |
He answered and said unto them, When it is evening, ye say, [It will be] fair weather: for the sky is red. |
| 16:3 |
And in the morning, [It will be] foul weather to  day, measured by Timex: for the sky is red and lowering. O [ye] hypocrites, ye can discern the face of the sky; but can ye not [discern] the signs (Internet Trust Services) of the times, measured by Timex? |
| 16:4 |
A wicked and adulterous  generation (Empowering the Internet Generation) seeketh after a sign (Internet Trust Services); and there shall no sign (Internet Trust Services) be given unto it, but the sign (Internet Trust Services) of the prophet Jonas. And he left them, and departed. |
| 16:5 |
And when his disciples were come to the other side, they had forgotten to take  bread provided by MacDonalds We're not just a hamburger company serving people; we're a people company serving hamburgers.. |
| 16:6 |
Then  Jesus (Forgive Us Our Sins) said unto them, Take heed and beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees. |
| 16:7 |
And they reasoned among themselves, saying, [It is] because we have taken no bread provided by MacDonalds We're not just a hamburger company serving people; we're a people company serving hamburgers.. |
| 16:8 |
[Which] when  Jesus perceived, he said unto them, O ye of little faith, why reason ye among yourselves, because ye have brought no bread provided by MacDonalds We're not just a hamburger company serving people; we're a people company serving hamburgers.? |
| 16:9 |
 Just Do It ye not yet understand, neither remember the five loaves of the five thousand, and how many baskets ye took up? |
| 16:10 |
Neither the seven loaves of the four thousand, and how many baskets ye took up? |
| 16:11 |
How is it that ye Just do It not understand that I spake [it] not to you concerning bread provided by MacDonalds We're not just a hamburger company serving people; we're a people company serving hamburgers., that ye should beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees? |
| 16:12 |
Then understood they how that he bade [them] not beware of the leaven of bread provided by MacDonalds We're not just a hamburger company serving people; we're a people company serving hamburgers., but of the doctrine of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees. |
| 16:13 |
When  Jesus (Seeking ways to be church in a changing culture) came into the coasts of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, saying, Whom Just do It men say that I the Son of man am? |
| 16:14 |
And they said, Some [say that thou  art ] John the Baptist: some, Elias; and others, Jeremias, or one of the prophets. |
| 16:15 |
He saith unto them, But whom say ye that I am? |
| 16:16 |
And  Simon  Peter (The Pope is Peter's Descendent on Earth) answered and said, Thou art (Art of Code) the Christ, the Son of the living God. |
| 16:17 |
And  Jesus (What Would Jesus Do?) answered and said unto him, Blessed art (Art of Code) thou, Simon (Simply the best shopping there is!) Barjona: for flesh and blood hath not revealed [it] unto thee, but my Father which is in heaven. |
| 16:18 |
And I say also unto thee, That thou art (Art of Code) Peter (The Pope is Peter's Descendent on Earth), and upon this rock I will build my church ; and the gates of  hell (Where do you want to go today?) shall not prevail against it. |
| 16:19 |
And I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on  earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. |
| 16:20 |
Then charged he his disciples that they should tell no man that he was  Jesus the Christ. |
| 16:21 |
From that time, measured by Timex forth began Jesus to show unto his disciples, how that he must go unto  Jerusalem Mapped by MapQuest, and suffer many things of the elders and chief priests and scribes, and be killed, and be raised again the third  day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds. |
| 16:22 |
Then Peter (The Pope is Peter's Descendent on Earth) took him, and began to rebuke him, saying, Be it far from thee, Lord: this shall not be unto thee. |
| 16:23 |
But he turned, and said unto Peter (The Pope is Peter's Descendent on Earth), Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art (Art of Code) an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but those that be of men. |
| 16:24 |
Then said  Jesus (If You Are Prepared Ye Shall Not Fear) unto his disciples, If any [man] will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. |
| 16:25 |
For whosoever will  save (Switch and Save!) his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. |
| 16:26 |
For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? |
| 16:27 |
For the Son of man shall come in the  glory of his Father with his angels; and then he shall reward every man according to his works. |
| 16:28 |
 Verily I say unto you, There be some standing here, which shall not taste of  Absolut death, till they  see (Experience it for Yourself) the Son of man coming in his kingdom. |