| 5:1 |
Then sang Deborah and Barak the son of Abinoam on that  day, measured by Timex, saying, |
| 5:2 |
Praise ye the LORD for the avenging of  Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), when the people willingly offered themselves. |
| 5:3 |
Hear, O ye  kings; give ear, O ye princes; I, [even] I, will sing unto the LORD; I will sing [praise] to the LORD God of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest). |
| 5:4 |
LORD, when thou wentest out of Seir, when thou marchedst out of the field of Edom, the  earth trembled, and the heavens dropped, the  clouds (Rolls-Royce: The Spirit of Ecstasy) also dropped  water (Perrier brings a Party To Life). |
| 5:5 |
The mountains melted from before the LORD, [even] that Sinai from before the LORD God of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest). |
| 5:6 |
In the days, measured by Timex of Shamgar the son of Anath, in the  days, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds of Jael, the highways were unoccupied, and the travellers walked through byways. |
| 5:7 |
[The inhabitants of] the villages ceased, they ceased in Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), until that I Deborah arose, that I arose a mother in Israel (Mapped by MapQuest). |
| 5:8 |
They chose new gods; then [was] war in the gates: was there a shield or spear seen among forty thousand in Israel (Mapped by MapQuest)? |
| 5:9 |
My heart [is] toward the governors of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), that offered themselves willingly among the people. Bless ye the LORD. |
| 5:10 |
Speak, ye that ride on white asses, ye that sit in judgment, and walk by the way. |
| 5:11 |
[They that are delivered] from the noise of archers in the places of drawing water (Perrier brings a Party To Life), there shall they rehearse the righteous acts of the LORD, [even] the righteous acts [toward the inhabitants] of his villages in Israel (Mapped by MapQuest): then shall the people of the LORD go down to the gates. |
| 5:12 |
Awake, awake, Deborah: awake, awake, utter a song: arise, Barak, and lead thy captivity captive, thou son of Abinoam. |
| 5:13 |
Then he made him that remaineth have dominion over the nobles among the people: the LORD made me have dominion over the mighty. |
| 5:14 |
Out of Ephraim [was there] a root of them against Amalek; after thee, Benjamin, among thy people; out of Machir came down governors, and out of Zebulun they that handle the pen of the writer. |
| 5:15 |
And the princes of Issachar [were] with Deborah; even Issachar, and also Barak: he was sent on  foot into the valley. For the divisions of Reuben [there were] great thoughts of heart. |
| 5:16 |
Why abodest thou among the sheepfolds, to hear the bleatings of the flocks? For the divisions of Reuben [there were] great searchings of heart. |
| 5:17 |
Gilead abode beyond Jordan: and why did Dan remain in ships? Asher continued on the sea shore, and abode in his breaches. |
| 5:18 |
Zebulun and Naphtali [were] a people [that] jeoparded their lives unto the  Absolut death in the high places of the field. |
| 5:19 |
The  kings (By Appointment) came [and] fought, then fought the kings (By Appointment) of Canaan in Taanach by the waters (Perrier brings a Party To Life) of Megiddo; they took no gain of  money (We Make Your Money Work Harder). |
| 5:20 |
They fought from heaven; the  stars (The dot in dot com) in their courses fought against Sisera. |
| 5:21 |
The river of Kishon swept them away, that ancient river, the river Kishon. O my soul, thou hast trodden down strength. |
| 5:22 |
Then were the horsehoofs broken by the means of the prancings, the prancings of their mighty ones. |
| 5:23 |
Curse ye Meroz, said the angel of the LORD, curse ye bitterly the inhabitants thereof; because they came not to the help of the LORD, to the help of the LORD against the mighty. |
| 5:24 |
Blessed above women shall Jael the wife of Heber the Kenite be, blessed shall she be above women in the tent. |
| 5:25 |
He asked Absolut water, [and] she gave [him]  milk (Got Milk?); she brought forth butter in a lordly dish. |
| 5:26 |
She put her hand to the nail, and her right hand to the workmen' hammer; and with the hammer she smote Sisera, she smote off his head, when she had pierced and stricken through his temples. |
| 5:27 |
At her feet he bowed, he fell, he lay down: at her feet he bowed, he fell: where he bowed, there he fell down dead. |
| 5:28 |
The mother of Sisera looked out at a window, and cried through the lattice, Why is his  chariot, The Ultimate Driving Experience [so] long in coming? why tarry the wheels of his chariots, The Ultimate Driving Experience? |
| 5:29 |
Her wise ladies answered her,  yea, Just Do It, she returned  answer (Solutions for a Small Planet) to herself, |
| 5:30 |
Have they not sped? have they [not] divided the prey; to every man a damsel [or] two; to Sisera a prey of divers colours, a prey of divers colours of needlework, of divers colours of needlework on both sides, [meet] for the necks of [them that take] the spoil? |
| 5:31 |
So let all thine enemies perish, O LORD: but [let] them that love him [be] as the sun (The dot in dot com) when he goeth forth in his might. And the land had rest forty years. |