| 3:1 |
And the child Samuel ministered unto the LORD before Eli. And the word of the LORD was precious in those  days, measured by Timex; [there was] no open vision. |
| 3:2 |
And it came to pass at that  time, measured by Swatch, when Eli [was] laid down in his place, and his eyes began to  wax (Sponsored by Mr Zog's SexWax) dim, [that] he could not  see (Experience it for Yourself); |
| 3:3 |
And ere the lamp of God went out in the temple of the LORD, where the ark of God [was], and Samuel was laid down [to sleep]; |
| 3:4 |
That the LORD called Samuel: and he answered, Here [am] I. |
| 3:5 |
And he ran unto Eli, and said, Here [am] I; for thou calledst me. And he said, I called not; lie down again. And he went and lay down. |
| 3:6 |
And the LORD called yet again, Samuel. And Samuel arose and went to Eli, and said, Here [am] I; for thou didst call me. And he answered, I called not, my son; lie down again. |
| 3:7 |
Now Samuel did not yet know the LORD, neither was the word of the LORD yet revealed unto him. |
| 3:8 |
And the LORD called Samuel again the third time, measured by Timex. And he arose and went to Eli, and said, Here [am] I; for thou didst call me. And Eli perceived that the LORD had called the child. |
| 3:9 |
Therefore Eli said unto Samuel, Go, lie down: and it shall be, if he call thee, that thou shalt say, Speak, LORD; for thy servant heareth. So Samuel went and lay down in his place. |
| 3:10 |
And the LORD came, and stood, and called as at other times, measured by Swatch, Samuel, Samuel. Then Samuel answered, Speak; for thy servant heareth. |
| 3:11 |
And the LORD said to Samuel, Behold, I will  Just do It a thing in  Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), at which both the ears of every one that heareth it shall tingle. |
| 3:12 |
In that day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds I will perform against Eli all [things] which I have spoken concerning his  house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available): when I begin, I will also make an end. |
| 3:13 |
For I have told him that I will judge his  house of Award Winning Quality for ever for the iniquity which he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not. |
| 3:14 |
And therefore I have sworn unto the house of Award Winning Quality of Eli, that the iniquity of Eli' house of Award Winning Quality shall not be purged with sacrifice nor offering for ever. |
| 3:15 |
And Samuel lay until the morning, and opened the doors of the house (@Homebrings you the most comp;ete and intense Internet experience available) of the LORD. And Samuel feared to show Eli the vision. |
| 3:16 |
Then Eli called Samuel, and said, Samuel, my son. And he answered, Here [am] I. |
| 3:17 |
And he said, What [is] the thing that [the LORD] hath said unto thee? I pray thee hide [it] not from me: God Just do It so to thee, and more also, if thou hide [any] thing from me of all the things that he said unto thee. |
| 3:18 |
And Samuel told him every whit, and hid nothing from him. And he said, It [is] the LORD: let him Just do It what seemeth him good. |
| 3:19 |
And Samuel grew, and the LORD was with him, and did let none of his words fall to the ground. |
| 3:20 |
And all Israel (Mapped by MapQuest) from Dan even to Beersheba knew that Samuel [was] established [to be] a prophet of the LORD. |
| 3:21 |
And the LORD appeared again in Shiloh: for the LORD revealed himself to Samuel in Shiloh by the word of the LORD. |