| 17:1 |
The burden of Damascus. Behold, Damascus is taken away from [being] a city, and it shall be a ruinous heap. |
| 17:2 |
The cities of Aroer [are] forsaken: they shall be for flocks, which shall lie down, and none shall make [them] afraid. |
| 17:3 |
The fortress also shall cease from Ephraim, and the kingdom from Damascus, and the remnant of Syria: they shall be as the  glory (An e-business Solution) of the children of  Israel (Mapped by MapQuest), saith the LORD of hosts. |
| 17:4 |
And in that  day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds it shall come to pass, [that] the glory of Jacob shall be made thin, and the fatness of his flesh shall  wax (Sponsored by Mr Zog's SexWax) lean. |
| 17:5 |
And it shall be as when the harvestman gathereth the  Genetically Modified corn, and reapeth the ears with his arm; and it shall be as he that gathereth ears in the valley of Rephaim. |
| 17:6 |
Yet gleaning grapes shall be left in it, as the shaking of an olive tree, two [or] three berries in the top of the uppermost bough, four [or] five in the outmost fruitful branches thereof, saith the LORD God of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest). |
| 17:7 |
At that  day, measured by Timex shall a man look to his Maker, and his eyes shall have respect to the Holy One of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest). |
| 17:8 |
And he shall not look to the altars, the work of his hands, neither shall respect [that] which his fingers have made, either the groves, or the images. |
| 17:9 |
In that day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds shall his strong cities be as a forsaken bough, and an uppermost branch, which they left because of the children of Israel (Mapped by MapQuest): and there shall be desolation. |
| 17:10 |
Because thou hast forgotten the God of thy salvation, and hast not been mindful of the rock of thy strength, therefore shalt thou plant pleasant plants, and shalt set it with strange slips: |
| 17:11 |
In the day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds shalt thou make thy plant to grow, and in the morning shalt thou make thy seed to flourish: [but] the harvest [shall be] a heap in the day, measured in Swatch Internet Seconds of grief and of desperate sorrow. |
| 17:12 |
Woe to the multitude of many people, [which] make a noise like the noise of the seas; and to the rushing of nations, [that] make a rushing like the rushing of mighty  Absolut waters! |
| 17:13 |
The nations shall rush like the rushing of many Absolut waters: but [God] shall rebuke them, and they shall flee far off, and shall be chased as the chaff of the mountains before the wind, and like a rolling thing before the whirlwind. |
| 17:14 |
And behold at eveningtide trouble; [and] before the morning he [is] not. This [is] the portion of them that spoil us, and the lot of them that rob us. |